It is a pretty good song by U-2, and we probably can all relate to it's lyrics in some way. And I also can believe that it is just another way of saying, "I haven't reached the apex or the vortex of maturity yet." Of course, there is no such thing. We never reach ultimate maturity... there is no such thing as being or reaching finality when it comes to maturity!
If I HAD found what I'm looking for, would I be rich, and live in the dream house I have always wanted? Probably not! And it is definitely good to have dreams and goals. And, say, go ahead.. drink another dram.
Everyone in the world is still looking for what they are looking for and what they WERE looking for. And not too many at all have really found it. Looking for it in pleasure-seeking will not get you there. Nor will seeking it within the perimeters of sorrow and pain.
Some christians say that in sorrow and trouble and the tests of life, we discover Christ and find out who God is. And often enough, that's true. But that is not the ultimate pinnacle in the quest for meaning. For, ultimately, that is not the rule of thumb. There is NO rule of thumb.
Whether in the quest for maturity or personal growth, the actual rule of thumb is to keep on going, and asking His guidance and searching for His face as you travel the roads and highways of life. In the high places, we find the "high" experiences. In the low places, we experience the lower experiences, the pain, sorrow or turmoil, trouble or grief. All this is part of the experience of finding what we have always been looking for.
We never ultimately find a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
We never ultimately find ultimate happiness in a perfect mate.
We never ultimately find ultimate life experiences just because that's what we were trying to do.
So let yourself experience living. Allow yourself to grow. To mature. Gracefully.
Have some respect for yourself and for others. And don't go around hating people. Not for any reason.
Ultimately, we find that although "I still haven't found what I'm looking for", I have found more purpose and joy than I ever dreamed possible!
Saturday, January 13, 2007
MATURITY AND PERSONAL GROWTH
I have written that I believe that maturity is the ability to endure uncertainty. Let me here define this term.
Maturity, I used to think, meant becoming 18. And when I became 18, I was just as immature as ever! Now, listen, I am speaking (writing) from the perspective of my current age, which is 58.
The next level of maturity should have come at the age of 21. But something else happened. Whatever else my maturity level might have become, at that age, my mindset was definitely framed around partying and getting stoned all the time. I lived a life of "debauchery", you might say. Yet, I had the temerity to know the value of a job and paying my bills. I knew that I would not like living on the streets.
After the age of 21, what is the next level of maturity? I absolutely knew, that when I was 13, I knew more than my mom & dad and everybody else older than me. And at 17, I knew the same thing. And at 21, I knew it then, too. When I was 30, I knew it. Knew that I was wiser than wise.
Maturity involves growth. Personal, deeply abiding growth. Growth which is painful, yet invigorating because of the freedom it brings. Not from people- but from self. And from the selfishness which had always defined me. Maybe it still does. I need to acknowledge that maybe I am still maturing.
Maturity is the ability to endure the uncertainties of life and living. To endure pain, suffering, calamity without falling emotionally apart. The ability to endure the pleasures, happiness, and all the positive aspects of growing emotionally, spiritually, intellectually.
Maturity is the ability to endure sorrow, heartache, heartbreak and loss. Maturity means that one has the courage, under fire, to go on... to continue to move... forward, onward and upward. It means that loss and sorrow and heartache does not keep me from continuing to live a productive life or cluttering and stopping traffic in the aisles or highways of life and living. I will go on! I must! I cannot stop living. Purpose fills my heart and mind, and there are reasons for me to go onward. Love for others is one of these! My love for God is the first and formost, for He gave me the mindset to discover that I am only one person in the whole scheme of things- and I am an important part of the machinery. Whether any one else recognizes that or not.
I'm not as mature as I want to be. I still have some selfish inclinations which hold me back from leaping certain hurdles in life.
To endure uncertainty... means to have the mindset, that no matter what, I must remain strong because I may be someone whom others are looking at and wondering if I am the example they should be following. And when no one is looking, what I am doing or being or thinking, is still important enough to warrant thinking about. Maybe no one sees me. This is where the conscience comes into play...
Conscience and maturity are things what happen when the lights go out. They are what happens when the earthquake happens. Or other natural catastrophes- of the emotional type or in the physical elements around us. Maybe the basement floods. Or a flood washes away our home. Maybe a fire burns our home, destroying everything. Or a tornado, or one of a dozen other kinds of disasters. Do we take these things in stride? Or do we fall apart and cry and withdraw? Do we stand or fall? Can others lean on us and depend upon us- or do we need to lean on and depend upon others?
Maturity isn't something that happens all at once and then that's all. Maturity isn't someone we know and are sure of. Not our mother or father, not a grandparent or some other important figue in our lives. They were never, are not fully at the apex of maturity.
They were growing and changing. My parents were mature- but still maturing. Maturing does not stop at a magical number, not at a mathematical point or fixture.
I see maturity sometimes in a child, who seems to have a wisdom beyond belief! But that doesn't make their experience and maturity a fixed position. There is still years more for that child to live and mature and grow.
And sometimes I see maturity in a young teenager... yet, I know that I don't see the whole picture. Maturity happens in different levels in our lives. We all experience something different and life's ladders & stairs present differing stages of growth in all people.
The vortex in maturity does not coincide with wisdom. A person can seem mature and discerning... and yet be lacking in some particular wisdom. Wisdom, too, like maturity, does not just happen all at once. We have all heard someone say, "He's wise beyond his years." This is never all-encompassing.
As I mature, I find that what I must endure in life is not all-encompassing. Loss of a loved one is not the end of my life. It is a shock and a set-back. Nothing ends life until the breath completely expires! Death is pretty final.
To lose someone I do not want. I lost my dad recently. It is completely devastating and demoralizing. But when one is experiencing some measure of maturity, then such loss doesn't destroy our sense of being. That loss will heighten our sense of self, and even in grief, we grow. We find God. We give in, not to despair but to the knowledge that this, too, is part of our growth.
Individuality comes when we have found out that the world doesn't end or didn't end when someone passed away or moved far away.
Maturity is not selfish. Personal growth is not selfish. It includes others. They may not be going through that growth process which you are or I am- but they are a part of mine and are a part of my life. For better or worse, or for right or wrong.
I descended the ladder to the stairways and on down into the corridors which finally reached down into hell. It scared me. I ran and climbed all the way back to the top.
I long to mature.
Maturity, I used to think, meant becoming 18. And when I became 18, I was just as immature as ever! Now, listen, I am speaking (writing) from the perspective of my current age, which is 58.
The next level of maturity should have come at the age of 21. But something else happened. Whatever else my maturity level might have become, at that age, my mindset was definitely framed around partying and getting stoned all the time. I lived a life of "debauchery", you might say. Yet, I had the temerity to know the value of a job and paying my bills. I knew that I would not like living on the streets.
After the age of 21, what is the next level of maturity? I absolutely knew, that when I was 13, I knew more than my mom & dad and everybody else older than me. And at 17, I knew the same thing. And at 21, I knew it then, too. When I was 30, I knew it. Knew that I was wiser than wise.
Maturity involves growth. Personal, deeply abiding growth. Growth which is painful, yet invigorating because of the freedom it brings. Not from people- but from self. And from the selfishness which had always defined me. Maybe it still does. I need to acknowledge that maybe I am still maturing.
Maturity is the ability to endure the uncertainties of life and living. To endure pain, suffering, calamity without falling emotionally apart. The ability to endure the pleasures, happiness, and all the positive aspects of growing emotionally, spiritually, intellectually.
Maturity is the ability to endure sorrow, heartache, heartbreak and loss. Maturity means that one has the courage, under fire, to go on... to continue to move... forward, onward and upward. It means that loss and sorrow and heartache does not keep me from continuing to live a productive life or cluttering and stopping traffic in the aisles or highways of life and living. I will go on! I must! I cannot stop living. Purpose fills my heart and mind, and there are reasons for me to go onward. Love for others is one of these! My love for God is the first and formost, for He gave me the mindset to discover that I am only one person in the whole scheme of things- and I am an important part of the machinery. Whether any one else recognizes that or not.
I'm not as mature as I want to be. I still have some selfish inclinations which hold me back from leaping certain hurdles in life.
To endure uncertainty... means to have the mindset, that no matter what, I must remain strong because I may be someone whom others are looking at and wondering if I am the example they should be following. And when no one is looking, what I am doing or being or thinking, is still important enough to warrant thinking about. Maybe no one sees me. This is where the conscience comes into play...
Conscience and maturity are things what happen when the lights go out. They are what happens when the earthquake happens. Or other natural catastrophes- of the emotional type or in the physical elements around us. Maybe the basement floods. Or a flood washes away our home. Maybe a fire burns our home, destroying everything. Or a tornado, or one of a dozen other kinds of disasters. Do we take these things in stride? Or do we fall apart and cry and withdraw? Do we stand or fall? Can others lean on us and depend upon us- or do we need to lean on and depend upon others?
Maturity isn't something that happens all at once and then that's all. Maturity isn't someone we know and are sure of. Not our mother or father, not a grandparent or some other important figue in our lives. They were never, are not fully at the apex of maturity.
They were growing and changing. My parents were mature- but still maturing. Maturing does not stop at a magical number, not at a mathematical point or fixture.
I see maturity sometimes in a child, who seems to have a wisdom beyond belief! But that doesn't make their experience and maturity a fixed position. There is still years more for that child to live and mature and grow.
And sometimes I see maturity in a young teenager... yet, I know that I don't see the whole picture. Maturity happens in different levels in our lives. We all experience something different and life's ladders & stairs present differing stages of growth in all people.
The vortex in maturity does not coincide with wisdom. A person can seem mature and discerning... and yet be lacking in some particular wisdom. Wisdom, too, like maturity, does not just happen all at once. We have all heard someone say, "He's wise beyond his years." This is never all-encompassing.
As I mature, I find that what I must endure in life is not all-encompassing. Loss of a loved one is not the end of my life. It is a shock and a set-back. Nothing ends life until the breath completely expires! Death is pretty final.
To lose someone I do not want. I lost my dad recently. It is completely devastating and demoralizing. But when one is experiencing some measure of maturity, then such loss doesn't destroy our sense of being. That loss will heighten our sense of self, and even in grief, we grow. We find God. We give in, not to despair but to the knowledge that this, too, is part of our growth.
Individuality comes when we have found out that the world doesn't end or didn't end when someone passed away or moved far away.
Maturity is not selfish. Personal growth is not selfish. It includes others. They may not be going through that growth process which you are or I am- but they are a part of mine and are a part of my life. For better or worse, or for right or wrong.
I descended the ladder to the stairways and on down into the corridors which finally reached down into hell. It scared me. I ran and climbed all the way back to the top.
I long to mature.
ARE PEOPLE COMING OR GOING OR STAYING?
Our street is covered with ice this morning. Today is Saturday, Jan 13 and normally we would be up early and off to Church. We are Seventh Day Adventists.
Yesterday afternoon, it began to sleet with only trace amounts of snow. It turned in to quite a storm! Not like a blizzard of snow or anything like that- but, definitely, the radio and tv stations were right... we were under a winter storm watch.
Businesses all over the city and metroplex were letting their employees leave early. People were afraid, and hit the streets by the thousands. By the time I left work- and I had to remain on the job til 4:30, my co-worker til 5:30- my drive home was on slick roads but the greatest danger was from people who seemed to think "my car is better than your car and I can drive faster than you can and I can stop on a dime". I listened to 980AM on the radio, for the constant weather updates and the call-in reports on road and highway conditions and discussions of why people are bad drivers.
Most of the time I had to drive at 20 to 25 mph- and I got out of our parking garage at work, at 4:40- yet managed to get home by 5:15. 9 miles approximately.
Our decision to stay home from church was made last night when it was still sleeting. It was really coming down with a vengeance, most of the evening it seemed like. For most of our married-life, we have lived just a few blocks away from church... but, now that we're into our new church building, it isn't so. We are miles from it. And THAT is intimidating, when the weather conditions seem harsh!
But the real issue in my mind right now, is in wondering about the things that attract people to a church or to a religion or to a particular religious denomination. And what keeps them there, faithful and excited about their faith... or what keeps them drifting from church to church... and what motivates people to gravitate toward a certain church when they haven't the means or transportation to really be able to get themselves there.
I talk with someone who is always excited about the things going on at their church. Talks passionately about how excited they are to be in love with the Saviour, how exciting it is to be in a large church full of people who are mostly just as excited about this love and passion as much as they are. A church where the average attendance on Sundays is at least 1500... maybe as many as 3000...
And I hear how when you walk in, your ears and eyes will meet a congregation whose voices swell with shouts of praise, prayer and exclamations of affirmations. With "holy hands raised in the air"! The excitement, I am told, is amazing and contagious and puts you in a "tongues-speaking" frame of mind.
I am very tolerant and believe that we all deserve the respect and the right to worship as we each see fit. After all, this was the premise for the beginnings of this country, right?
Wrong!
Those who first settled this country were extremely intolerant in matters of religion! It took men like Roger Williams to take a stand upon conscience and to say to all those around him, God meant for us to have the freedom to worship Him according to the dictates of our own minds- and not according to the consensus of the majority of society.
I believe in religious liberty. I always have, and have always marched to the beat of a different drummer. Internally, I know what is right- and what is right for me. In matters of conscience, society has no right to dictate in matters which have to do with conscience, and individuality. Society should only invade personal perimeters when an individual becomes a danger and a threat to others!
Our churches across America are full of people who hunger for a relationship with Jesus Christ... with God our Father, and with the Holy Spirit. People who experience that relationship and are growing daily in that experience. These people are from all walks in life, from all social levels, from all kinds of different mindsets. Ordinary people- and many who are not so ordinary.
And when I say "our churches", I mean all protestantism and all the other realms as well- the
Catholic, Mormons, Jehovah's Witness, Christian Scienc, Scientology... These are all American religious groups, and tho we are all very different, every man, woman and child has the right to believe and worship as they want. We should ALL respect one another's right, as far as religious freedom and expression is concerned. The line is drawn if religious expressions involve ritual murder, sexual exploitation, dismemberment, slavery, multiple marriage, or anything else which blatantly or not, interferes with personal freedom of another person.
So what is happening in our American cultures?
Why are people leaving their churches and dropping out of practicing matters of faith? Why are people leaving their churches and deciding to live for self only? Or to live as a believer but without the benefits of a church membership? Why are people going church-hopping? Why are some people-including couples- leaving churches where they have pursued a particular experience for years & years- and then suddenly quitting? And staying at home. Why are people who have been ultra-conservative all their lives leaving their churches to go to one that is very liberal? What is the difference between the liberal and the conservative churches? What is the difference between a non-church goer who is a "good person" - and the person who is and does the other?
And why are there so many people who believe in God but do not believe in all the trappings which go with being a member and practicing believer of some church or religious organization?
How many believe in God and Jesus and the Holy Spirit- and do not want to belong to a church?
Are more people coming into churches than out? Are churches across America growing? Or are they experiencing dwindling numbers for multiple reasons? And are more people leaving churches and religious organizations than are going into them? Or are the mainstream churches and religions holding their own, against the tide of human movement in a million directions?
God Himself is still very much active in the lives of billions of people, many of whom recognize it, and many who do not. God is still working on the lives and hearts of billions of people who are confused and don't know where to turn- or are going from church to church- or from religion to religion. God is just as present in the lives of believers and non-believers, as ever. God hasn't stopped loving the creation of mankind.
People are leaving churches because someone has offended them or the minister spoke a message which was offensive to their ears. They might go to another church within the same denomination... or change denominations. Why? Is the answer elusive? Not at all- but it IS one that people do not like. I won't go into that.
People who believe in Saturday as the seventh-day Sabbath leave that belief system- and stop going to church. Or they go to a Sunday church. Or return to one they had come from to begin with.
And just as many people are leaving Sunday churches and finding their ways into churches which are seventh day. Jewish folk often do not practice their beliefs in the formal way which was originally so. Some of them become members of denominations for many different reasons. And there are many, many people who decide to become members of the Jewish religion.
And why do people hear the message of righteousness by faith at a Revelation Seminar and leave the church or the lifestyle they had been living, to become a member of that group which gave the seminar? They know that they have discovered a truth that cannot be lived without! And yet, sometimes, after some weeks or months or years, they disappear from that group. Why? Some say they were not being "fed" or "nurtured" as they wanted to be. There are many other "reasons". Sometimes they are offended by a member of the church. Or they think they can't stand the "hypocracy".
It's the same in many protestant groups! People weary of the "forms" and "rituals". They are offended by someone. Or get mad at someone. Or they begin to "find" that they are not being "blessed", "fed" or "nurtured" as they would like. People are leaving major denominations all the time. In search of something meaningful. Sometimes in search of a mate. Or people to be social with. Or to find people to just date.
The biggest "black-hole" that I see has multiple creatures in it, ready to gobble up the unsuspecting!
Those creatures are things like "Pastor --- was very unkind to me. I'm leaving". Or, "someone I'd always trusted in that church has hurt me deeply or has offended me or made me mad." "So and so's kid hurt my kid- now they will be the enemy." "I really got tired of all those pleas for my money." "This pastor's messages didn't do a thing for me." "I'm just not being fed, here at this church." "This church just isn't Christlike". "There aren't enough people here who are mature enough to keep this church together". "This church stifles my sense of being."
How very sad that people are not grounded well, in faith.
How very sad that people can leave a good experience and feel that they can find a better one elsewhere. How very sad that people can feel that their feelings are more important than everything else! Does that mean they were never well-nurtured and kept involved and growing in faith? Is it someone else's fault?
I take heart in the fact that people are church-hopping, and looking for "the truth". Because when we find it, we know it. And there are no "externals" which will drive us from that. NO amount of tugging, and pulling and twisting will get this person away from God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. The person who is really and truly rooted in their relationship with God will not leave it because someone said or did something offending.
Indeed, the mature christian will be able to stand on his or her own, and say "tho I am offended, hurt or treated badly, I have Jesus- and I'm NOT GOING ANYWHERE."
So, is the question ansered? Are people coming or going or staying? Maybe.
But maturity is the ability to endure uncertainty.
Many, many people have lots of other definitions of maturity. Which is fine. We are all free-agents and can believe whatever we want to, right?
But how can we discern when our own selfish minds are interfering with our spiritual thinking and growth?
Personally, I know the truth. And I am still a sinner. But, God loves me. He is working in my heart and life and mind. I'm so glad He is... I want Him. I want this relationship to be everything it should be- on His terms. Not mine.
Are you coming or going or staying?
Yesterday afternoon, it began to sleet with only trace amounts of snow. It turned in to quite a storm! Not like a blizzard of snow or anything like that- but, definitely, the radio and tv stations were right... we were under a winter storm watch.
Businesses all over the city and metroplex were letting their employees leave early. People were afraid, and hit the streets by the thousands. By the time I left work- and I had to remain on the job til 4:30, my co-worker til 5:30- my drive home was on slick roads but the greatest danger was from people who seemed to think "my car is better than your car and I can drive faster than you can and I can stop on a dime". I listened to 980AM on the radio, for the constant weather updates and the call-in reports on road and highway conditions and discussions of why people are bad drivers.
Most of the time I had to drive at 20 to 25 mph- and I got out of our parking garage at work, at 4:40- yet managed to get home by 5:15. 9 miles approximately.
Our decision to stay home from church was made last night when it was still sleeting. It was really coming down with a vengeance, most of the evening it seemed like. For most of our married-life, we have lived just a few blocks away from church... but, now that we're into our new church building, it isn't so. We are miles from it. And THAT is intimidating, when the weather conditions seem harsh!
But the real issue in my mind right now, is in wondering about the things that attract people to a church or to a religion or to a particular religious denomination. And what keeps them there, faithful and excited about their faith... or what keeps them drifting from church to church... and what motivates people to gravitate toward a certain church when they haven't the means or transportation to really be able to get themselves there.
I talk with someone who is always excited about the things going on at their church. Talks passionately about how excited they are to be in love with the Saviour, how exciting it is to be in a large church full of people who are mostly just as excited about this love and passion as much as they are. A church where the average attendance on Sundays is at least 1500... maybe as many as 3000...
And I hear how when you walk in, your ears and eyes will meet a congregation whose voices swell with shouts of praise, prayer and exclamations of affirmations. With "holy hands raised in the air"! The excitement, I am told, is amazing and contagious and puts you in a "tongues-speaking" frame of mind.
I am very tolerant and believe that we all deserve the respect and the right to worship as we each see fit. After all, this was the premise for the beginnings of this country, right?
Wrong!
Those who first settled this country were extremely intolerant in matters of religion! It took men like Roger Williams to take a stand upon conscience and to say to all those around him, God meant for us to have the freedom to worship Him according to the dictates of our own minds- and not according to the consensus of the majority of society.
I believe in religious liberty. I always have, and have always marched to the beat of a different drummer. Internally, I know what is right- and what is right for me. In matters of conscience, society has no right to dictate in matters which have to do with conscience, and individuality. Society should only invade personal perimeters when an individual becomes a danger and a threat to others!
Our churches across America are full of people who hunger for a relationship with Jesus Christ... with God our Father, and with the Holy Spirit. People who experience that relationship and are growing daily in that experience. These people are from all walks in life, from all social levels, from all kinds of different mindsets. Ordinary people- and many who are not so ordinary.
And when I say "our churches", I mean all protestantism and all the other realms as well- the
Catholic, Mormons, Jehovah's Witness, Christian Scienc, Scientology... These are all American religious groups, and tho we are all very different, every man, woman and child has the right to believe and worship as they want. We should ALL respect one another's right, as far as religious freedom and expression is concerned. The line is drawn if religious expressions involve ritual murder, sexual exploitation, dismemberment, slavery, multiple marriage, or anything else which blatantly or not, interferes with personal freedom of another person.
So what is happening in our American cultures?
Why are people leaving their churches and dropping out of practicing matters of faith? Why are people leaving their churches and deciding to live for self only? Or to live as a believer but without the benefits of a church membership? Why are people going church-hopping? Why are some people-including couples- leaving churches where they have pursued a particular experience for years & years- and then suddenly quitting? And staying at home. Why are people who have been ultra-conservative all their lives leaving their churches to go to one that is very liberal? What is the difference between the liberal and the conservative churches? What is the difference between a non-church goer who is a "good person" - and the person who is and does the other?
And why are there so many people who believe in God but do not believe in all the trappings which go with being a member and practicing believer of some church or religious organization?
How many believe in God and Jesus and the Holy Spirit- and do not want to belong to a church?
Are more people coming into churches than out? Are churches across America growing? Or are they experiencing dwindling numbers for multiple reasons? And are more people leaving churches and religious organizations than are going into them? Or are the mainstream churches and religions holding their own, against the tide of human movement in a million directions?
God Himself is still very much active in the lives of billions of people, many of whom recognize it, and many who do not. God is still working on the lives and hearts of billions of people who are confused and don't know where to turn- or are going from church to church- or from religion to religion. God is just as present in the lives of believers and non-believers, as ever. God hasn't stopped loving the creation of mankind.
People are leaving churches because someone has offended them or the minister spoke a message which was offensive to their ears. They might go to another church within the same denomination... or change denominations. Why? Is the answer elusive? Not at all- but it IS one that people do not like. I won't go into that.
People who believe in Saturday as the seventh-day Sabbath leave that belief system- and stop going to church. Or they go to a Sunday church. Or return to one they had come from to begin with.
And just as many people are leaving Sunday churches and finding their ways into churches which are seventh day. Jewish folk often do not practice their beliefs in the formal way which was originally so. Some of them become members of denominations for many different reasons. And there are many, many people who decide to become members of the Jewish religion.
And why do people hear the message of righteousness by faith at a Revelation Seminar and leave the church or the lifestyle they had been living, to become a member of that group which gave the seminar? They know that they have discovered a truth that cannot be lived without! And yet, sometimes, after some weeks or months or years, they disappear from that group. Why? Some say they were not being "fed" or "nurtured" as they wanted to be. There are many other "reasons". Sometimes they are offended by a member of the church. Or they think they can't stand the "hypocracy".
It's the same in many protestant groups! People weary of the "forms" and "rituals". They are offended by someone. Or get mad at someone. Or they begin to "find" that they are not being "blessed", "fed" or "nurtured" as they would like. People are leaving major denominations all the time. In search of something meaningful. Sometimes in search of a mate. Or people to be social with. Or to find people to just date.
The biggest "black-hole" that I see has multiple creatures in it, ready to gobble up the unsuspecting!
Those creatures are things like "Pastor --- was very unkind to me. I'm leaving". Or, "someone I'd always trusted in that church has hurt me deeply or has offended me or made me mad." "So and so's kid hurt my kid- now they will be the enemy." "I really got tired of all those pleas for my money." "This pastor's messages didn't do a thing for me." "I'm just not being fed, here at this church." "This church just isn't Christlike". "There aren't enough people here who are mature enough to keep this church together". "This church stifles my sense of being."
How very sad that people are not grounded well, in faith.
How very sad that people can leave a good experience and feel that they can find a better one elsewhere. How very sad that people can feel that their feelings are more important than everything else! Does that mean they were never well-nurtured and kept involved and growing in faith? Is it someone else's fault?
I take heart in the fact that people are church-hopping, and looking for "the truth". Because when we find it, we know it. And there are no "externals" which will drive us from that. NO amount of tugging, and pulling and twisting will get this person away from God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. The person who is really and truly rooted in their relationship with God will not leave it because someone said or did something offending.
Indeed, the mature christian will be able to stand on his or her own, and say "tho I am offended, hurt or treated badly, I have Jesus- and I'm NOT GOING ANYWHERE."
So, is the question ansered? Are people coming or going or staying? Maybe.
But maturity is the ability to endure uncertainty.
Many, many people have lots of other definitions of maturity. Which is fine. We are all free-agents and can believe whatever we want to, right?
But how can we discern when our own selfish minds are interfering with our spiritual thinking and growth?
Personally, I know the truth. And I am still a sinner. But, God loves me. He is working in my heart and life and mind. I'm so glad He is... I want Him. I want this relationship to be everything it should be- on His terms. Not mine.
Are you coming or going or staying?
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